“Bitch is a 5-letter word that means taking back your power.” – Erin Stump (Me)
I said this while out with my husband and a friend a few weeks ago. It really struck me, the power we give to words. I remember being a kid and people saying words can’t hurt you. Excuse me, YES, THEY FUCKING CAN.
Some of the most damaging words that have been said to me were said by me. So, the question becomes when should we give words power and when should we tell them to fuck off?
As womxn, we are held to the expectation of always being polite or kind. When we start setting boundaries and begin speaking our minds, people love to throw around words like bitch, calm down, etc. If we don’t “stay in the lines”, it becomes convenient for people to throw hurtful words our way or claim that we are “crazy”.
This is where my mindset of taking back the power of those words comes into play. You can absolutely choose if you allow words to hurt you. When we bravely put ourselves and our lives on the internet for people to see, there is always a chance that someone will say something hurtful.
We must choose what we take personally and when someone is projecting their own insecurities or feelings on us. When we are in our own mess it is easy to throw our shit on another person. That doesn’t make it okay, but it does happen. We have all done it at some point, moving past that is where the growth happens. This is the moment of realization and awakening. When you see that you have done this, but this is also where you get to take back that power. Where you get to forgive yourself for the damage that your words did and get to start setting the boundaries of what words you will give power.
When someone tells me that I am a bitch or an asshole I take a moment and try to see if I am really being that, or if they are simply upset that I am not allowing them to cross my boundaries. You know why because sometimes I am both of those things and I am perfectly fine with that. I get to take my power back by saying FUCK YEAH, I’M A BITCH. It doesn’t make me more or less worthy; it just means that someone overstepped MY boundaries and I stood up for myself.
We are all human and sometimes things hurt. That is perfectly acceptable. One of the ways to stand in your power is to know your boundaries and decide what you give power to. This absolutely includes the words that are said to you.
*Keep an eye out for The Power of Words Worksheet coming soon!*
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Erin is a Spiritual Life Coach and Reiki Master Teacher. She started this blog as a way to share her self-love and body acceptance journey. Over the past 5 years it has become her business, her passion, and her purpose. She has created coaching programs to help other women find their truth, love their bodies, and embody their power and purpose.